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January 14, 2007
Pretty Puppy Fashion Show!
Name: Harvey
Breed: American Hairless Terrier
Age: Six months, twenty days
Weight: Five pounds (fatty)
Favorite Foods: Cheese, stew beef, rat feces, dust bunnies
Favorite Toys: Socks, crumpled up balls of paper, little men made of fleece
Tricks: Sit, Lay Down, Come, Stand (back legs), (run in a) Circle
Potty Training: Getting there...
Bugs: Mild separation anxiety, shyness, submissive urination
Features: Cleanliness, portability, non-shedding, hypoallergenic, extremely quiet, generalized snuggly sweetness
The Black Sweater. Simple. Classic. The eternal look. The black sweater says, "I'm a cold little dog, but I refuse to compromise." Equally at home lounging on the couch or wedged underneath it, excavating more forbidden treats.
The Skull Hoodie. So you weigh slightly less than a cough. That's no excuse. Bury the needle on the badass-o-meter with sulky chic. That chihuahua down the block had better WATCH HIMSELF.
The Camo Tee. Is there even a dog in this shot? BECAUSE I DON'T SEE IT. Oh GOD.
Winter Wear. A cranberry snuggle suit, topped with a loose gray sweatshirt. All that's missing is the quilted windbreaker, but Harvey has a hard time walking in three layers. Kind of like the little brother in A Christmas Story. We're working on it.
And hey, look! A festive sweater from Gran'maw! And whoops, I posted a picture of it online and everything. All that black cloth and camo, all for nothing. That there is a sequin snowflake. THERE GOES YOUR STREET CRED, HARVEY.
Don't worry, sweetie. Y'won't have to wear it to the dog park.
(PS: Tomorrow is mail-answering day, and also Big Announcement Day! Stay tuned!)
Posted by Spike at January 14, 2007 09:10 PM
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