May 2005 Archives

If you're a dork like I am, you probably play video games. That means you might know who Will Wright is.

He's the Sim guy. SimCity, SimEarth, The Sims, The Sims2, etc. He was one of the first designers to mess around with the concept of video-game-as-toy, instead of a goal-oriented twitch muscle stand-off. And really, the world's a better place for it.

Wright's got a new project these days, called Spore. Control the development of a sentient species on an alien planet, from life in the tide pool to interstellar colonization. And I DEFY YOU to keep your hands away from your crotch for the entirety of its presentation to a crowd at GDCE 05.

The slide portion of the presentation doesn't want to load, so we can't see a few things that make the crowd giggle, or Wright's Quizilla "which Care Bear are you?" results (he's Funshine). But there are plenty of in-game walkabouts, and shots of every level.

You'll need to register to see the video, but it's so worth the hassle. Trust me. Just feed the form a BugMeNot password and get to watching.

And afterwards, start babysitting the official site, like I am. Nothing's up now, but the Flash intro's a lot of fun to watch over and over and OVER WHILE SOBBING QUIETLY TO YOURSELF. Because this thing probably has years of development ahead of it before it'll be ready to go gold.

Sigh.

Old John Brown left Kansas before the blood had dried
And as he rode his head did shine like the sun in mid-July
In a tiny farm house by Brunswick B & O
He warmed his boots by the fireplace and read aloud from Samuel

David rose to meet the Philistines with five smooth stones and a sling

One October morning his army did approach
The armory that sat between the Potomac and Shenandoah
The engine house flung open with report of several guns
When it was done he looked upon the bodies of his dying sons

David rose to meet the Philistines with five smooth stones and a sling

-- Clutch, David Rose. Hidden song on The Elephant Riders. Also compiled on Evolution's Finest Hour.

They just don't make violent, raving, evangelical Fundamentalists like they used to, do they?

John Brown bought his first class, one-way ticket on the crazy train today in 1856. His actions... namely, the wholesale slaughter of his pro-slavery neighbors, followed by a failed attempt to seize an armory with which to outfit his budding abolitionist army, capture, and subsequent hanging... was one of several catalysts that finally initiated the then already inevitable American Civil War.

Kansas was pretty embarrassed when it happened, but they've got monuments to the guy, now. Just goes to show.

So if you've got the time today, take a little break and read up on your pal and mine, John Brown. Maybe pour a little something out on the curb, in appreciation of all of the fabulous lunatic bastards in history who ever suffered for being right before their time. And wonder aloud why no one's thought to make little beanbag dollies of the guy.

Hell, I'd buy one.

I've got an Edward Scissorhands dolly.

They could fight.

Done:

-- The preservation and preparation of the divine immortal body of Beavis I.
-- The wrapping and adornment of the divine immortal body of Beavis I.

Left to do:

-- The Opening of the Mouth ceremony.
-- The filling of the canopic jars.
-- The making of the sarcophagus.
-- The finding of a way to de-stenchify the hippie-stink of frankincense, myrrh, sandalwood, and cassia oil from the very goddamn soul of my apartment. Eau de Rainbow Gathering is not my favorite scent.

More pictures and details later on this weekend.

I'm not saying he's faking. I'm just saying I don't believe it.

The article's been updated since I first read it, and reluctantly admits he's not the virtuoso the popular press made him out to be, but that's really still not enough to assuage my suspicions.

Anonymous 20-something, found in a black suit and tie with the labels removed, who insists on playing the piano as often as possible and refuses to communicate with doctors and therapists? I'm not purposely taking the wood axe to anyone's sense of childlike wonder, here, but that's not how life works.

And the photograph isn't helping. He looks like he's auditioning for Sean Penn's part in I Am Sam. And knows it.

My hoax sense is tingling.

Possibly Lucas & Odessa, too. It all depends on what's left to do after I go to bed, tonight.

I'll keep you guys posted.

Scatman Crothers - Ahm A Niggerman. From the soundtrack of Coonskin (AKA Street Fight), Ralph Bakshi's very best movie ever.

Get to downloading, before Brer Rabbit gets any testier.

Much <3 for Cartoon Brew for the link. Gonna be wearing this one out, big time.

Bored?

"pornography addiction recovery forum."
"video game addiction."
"glomp bishies."
"indigo children."
"crystal skull energy."
"past/previous life" or "my past/previous life," followed by the name of any famous person dead more than twenty or so years.
"evils of birth control."
"my anime idea."
"Gorean lifestyle."
"vampire crossover."

Hit a search engine. Take that list. Thank me later.

You'll have to excuse Betini, he seems to have gotten a little mopey. He's having a rough day.

Comics section. MAKE IT HAPPEN.

Read Lucas & Odessa today, beginning to end, for FREE!

Read Sparkneedle today, beginning to end, for FREE!

HURRY HURRY HURRY GO GO GO!

1.) Install Firefox.
2.) Acquire and install the following extensions.

ForecastFox.
Adblock. (Preferably with the latest filter set here.)
Spellbound.

3.) :)

Hot damn.

See it.

Really. See it.

And if I don't see at least one Landlady or Axe Gang cosplayer at my table breaks this con season to take a picture with, I'm going to just be mortifyingly disappointed with you all.