Music Appreciation: October 2003 Archives

Halloween is tomorrow, and there's this whole movie-inspired pirate meme going around lately. So this seems especially appropriate.

Clutch - Big News III

An unreleased track from the Elephant Riders sessions, Big News III is, naturally, the follow-up to Big News and Big News II, also about sailors contending with the supernatural. Initially, harpies and Jonah, fresh from the whale. Then, mermen and characters from Star Wars. It was just kinda a matter of time until they got to the vengeful living dead.

Warning: Rampant waste of human life and sperm whale oil, cannibalism, adultery, angry oceans and equally angry dead men. 4.7 MB download, so-so quality.

Lyrics behind the cut. Enjoy.

Jesus H. Christ.

"Lil' Markie," the alter-ego of devoted Christian and equally devoted slobbering psychopath Mark Fox, appears on no less than ten fiendish instruments of Inquistional torture albums promoting fundamentalist Christian values. Markie's described as a child, and there's some attempt to make him sound like a child, although Fox's drastically altered voice makes Markie come off a little more like a lisping mongoloid sucking on a helium tank.

I guess that's supposed to be endearing.

"Diary of an Unborn Child" is Mark's magnum opus. It's a four minute, twenty-seven second Trail of Tears chronicling a fetus's conception, three months of growth, and termination ... a termination that honestly comes as a welcome relief from Markie's glottal nose-whistling about how I AM A REAL PERSON WITH FEELINGS AND TOENAILS AND I LOVE FLOWERS. A relief, that is, until the freshly vaccumed wad of tissue, described as a cute-as-a-button Aryan poster boy who wanted ever so much to be named Andy, starts to sing.

Lil' Markie - Diary of an Unborn Child

Ultimately, I think this song's meant to discourage abortions. Which is interesting, because after listening to the forced sobs near the end of the track, I scheduled four abortions for the next morning, and a follow-up uterus-scraping just to safe.

Lyrics to the sung portion, if they could be called that, below the cut. Enjoy, if possible.